Greece is the Word: In 6th grade there were signs that my girlfriend Rhonda was going to leave me (signs like her making out with my friend Jordan). In a last-ditch effort to save the relationship I threatened her by saying that if she left I would never take her back. Greece is pulling a Rhonda right now, as there are increased concerns that it is going to leave the Euro and go to its own currency. Foolish? Perhaps. Do we care? Well, people looking to refinance will care because it could, in theory, drive rates down. We’ve seen an increase in the appetite for bonds by foreign investors hedging their bets that Greece will leave. And just what does this do for rates?

Interest Rate Update: They are still beautifully low, Mortgage Fans. While 30-yr fixed rates remain in the high 3s/low 4s (ARM rates about a point lower) the rates have come down a lot on the 15-yr fixed (3-ish) and 20-yr fixed (around 3.50%). All rates can fluctuate depending on credit score, type of home, and equity in the home.

Opinion Quote of the Day 2: “I find a duck’s opinion of me is very much influenced by whether or not I have bread.” – Mitch Hedberg (comedian)

Timeout for Trivia: Congrats to those who guessed Billy Joel as last week’s answer. Want to be entered into a drawing to win University of Kansas deck of cards? Simply email me the answer to this week’s “Who Am I?” question. Good luck: “I turn 26 today. In a GQ Magazine article I said I am bisexual because I fell in love with a stripper. That article was taken out of context (although there’s this girl Jennifer I know who has the hottest body!). Despite what Spielberg says I am not a racist. I am a good girl; I try to save the world (ask Shia) and save the environment by going green (ask my husband).”

Interest Rate Update: A reminder to let you guys know that rates on 10-yr and 15-yr fixed are really low (high 2s/ low 3s)… and if they drop to zero percent I’ve started to wonder if I would still have a job. 30-yr fixed remains a gift in the high 3s/low 4s with ARM rates about a point lower. Don’t forget to tell your friends and coworkers about my blue-light special: For any loan over $240k (purchase or refinance) I will waive all fees – this is a $1,295 savings!

Wuss’Up This Week: Oil prices have fallen following signs of the slowing US economic growth, reports that US inventory supplies are high, and weakness in China’s demand. What does this mean? For one, falling energy prices are good for mortgage interest rates. Secondly…well, that’s all we really care about in this blog. However, rates won’t stay low forever and reports due out this week can sway rates in either direction. Thursday’s Jobless Claims report and 30-yr Treasury Bond Auction are two of the biggies. Hey, speaking of bond auctions just a reminder that you’ve got 15 shopping days left until my birthday and bonds are the top of my list. Just sayin’.

Thinking Quote of the Day 2: “I think I am, therefore, I am. I think.” – George Carlin

Timeout for Trivia: Congrats to those of you who guessed George Clooney as last week’s answer. Want to be entered into a drawing to win a box of Ortega taco shells (ten pack)? Simply email me the answer to this week’s “Who Am I?” question. Good luck: “Today I turn 63. I’ve written and performed top 40 hits in the 70s, 80s, and 90s. Tom Hanks is a big fan of mine (at least you’d think so if you saw his sitcom) and so is my ex-wife, who in my 1985 video appeared as the redheaded girl in a Chevrolet. If you listen to my song from 1989 you’d think we were being blamed for arson.”

Don’t forget about my Dos de Mayo Special today: For any loan over $240k I will waive all lender fees! This is a $1,295 savings and is can be used on any purchase or refinance deal. Why would you want to buy or refinance a home now…?

…Because rates are so low! A 30-yr fixed remains in the high 3s/low 4s with ARM rates about a point lower. Don’t forget that rates can change daily and are always based on type of home, equity in the home, credit scores, and if you think “Hip to be Square” was the worst song of the 80s.

Wuss’Up This Week: The first week of any given month is always crucial to how rates fluctuate, as three reports are released regarding the employment status of our nation (today’s ADP Employment, Thursday’s Weekly Jobless Claims, and Friday’s Employment report for April). If you are thinking of floating a rate or locking it in my advice would be to lock! Rates, like my high school report cards, have nowhere to go but up.

Heaven Quote of the Day 2: “When you die, if you get a choice of going to regular heaven or pie heaven, choose pie heaven. It might be a trick, but if not, mmmmm, boy.” – Deep Thoughts by Jack Handey (SNL)

Timeout for Trivia: Congrats to those of you who correctly guessed Renee Zellweger as last week’s answer. Want to be entered into a drawing to win a Police Academy 4 poster? Simply email me the answer to this week’s “Who Am I?” question. Good luck: “Hey, Mr. Handsome here to let you know that on Sunday I turn 51. You might have seen me playing a handyman on The Facts of Life or as Roseanne Barr’s supervisor on Roseanne, but what put me on the map was starring in a TV drama with Goose (from ’94-’99). Still don’t know who I am? Think about it. And until then, good night and good luck.”

Wuss’Up This Week: A whole lotta stuff coming out that can impact interest rates. Most important this week will be today’s Durable Goods Orders (this is a report of demand for big items that last more than 3 years – i.e. cars, refrigerators, the jug of ketchup I just bought at Costco, etc.) which is expected to be up 2.4%. If this comes in lower rates may go down. Also today, we have the ‘Fed Meeting Adjourns’ in which few people expect the Fed to change rates…but what Fed Chief Ben Bernanke says after the meeting will be analyzed to death and can impact rates.

Interest Rate Update: Rates for a 30-yr fixed remain in the high 3s/low 4s with ARM rates about a point lower. Don’t forget that rates vary based on credit score, type of home, equity in the home, and if you watch any reality show about housewives in a different city. Also, don’t forget that for any loan over $240k I will waive all lender fees (this can be for a purchase or refinance) – a $1,200 savings! Please be sure to let your friends, family, coworkers, Sox AND Cubs fans know this.

Emotion Quote of the Day 2: “Women complain men don’t have any emotions. We have the same emotions as you, we just don’t go through every one of them every single day.” – Robert Duchane (comedian)

Timeout for Trivia: Congrats to those who guessed Carmen Electra as last week’s answer. Want to be entered into a drawing to win a bag of fortune cookies? Simply email me the answer to this week’s “Who Am I?” question. Good luck: “Today I turn 43. What could you read in my diary that would interest you? Maybe the fact that I starred in a Texas Chainsaw Massacre film with Matthew McConaughey, or how I had a small role in Reality Bites. Or maybe it’s my love life: I like to date singers (see Kenny Chesney or White Stripes’ frontman Jack White, who had me with his song “Hello Operator”).”

Didja Know…? The largest bill ever printed was the $100,000 bill back in 1934. Woodrow Wilson was depicted on the bill and these notes were not circulated among the general public. Instead, they were used for transactions between Federal Reserve banks. It was rumored that the Fed Chief at the time would make his coworkers pay the lunch delivery guy saying that, “All I have in my wallet is the $100,000 bill that he won’t be able to make change for.”

Interest Rate Update: Come and get ‘em while they’re hot! I’ve still got 30-yr fixed rates in the high 3s/low 4s with ARM rates about a point lower. For any purchase or refinance loan over $240k I will pay for all lender fees (a $1,295 savings!). And don’t forget that rates vary based on type of home, equity in the home, credit score, and how my haircut goes today.

Drug Quote of the Day 2: “The term ‘sex addict’ makes it sound like sex is a drug. And I guess after 23 years of marriage, in my house it is called a controlled substance.” – Bobby Slayton (comedian)

Timeout for Trivia: Congrats to those who correctly guessed Shannon Doherty as last week’s answer. Want to be entered into a drawing to win a jar of Vicks vapo-rub? Simply email me the correct answer to this week’s “Who Am I?” question. Good luck: “In two days I turn 40. In the late 90s I married a guy with rainbow hair but predictably that didn’t last. After that I made a few appearances in Playboy Magazine and starred in Baywatch. Nope, I’m not Pam Anderson. I’m just a girl you would single out as once being a fan of Jane’s Addiction.”

Wuss’Up This Week: Today the Fed will release their Beige Book – a report that details current economic conditions across the US. Signs of weakness will lead to lower rates, but I’m guessing that it will be a mostly upbeat report as Bernanke has been hinting at the recovery building momentum. Recovering economy = higher rates. So how do we keep our cake and rates low and eat them too? Well, today and tomorrow the government will be auctioning off 10-year Treasury Notes and 30-year Treasury Bonds. A strong demand at these auctions will lead to lower rates. Open those wallets, Mortgage Fans, and buy some notes and bonds. And while wallets are open let’s not forget that there are still 44 shopping days left until my birthday.

Interest Rate Update: 30-yr fixed rates remain in the high 3s/low 4s, and ARM rates are about a point lower. Please remember that rates are based on type of home, equity in the home, credit score, and if the Cubs will score at all. And don’t forget: For any loan over $240k I will waive all lender fees on purchases and refinances – a $1,200 savings!

Taxes Quote of the Day 2: “I just taught my kids about taxes by eating 38% of their ice-cream.” – Conan O’Brien

Timeout for Trivia: Congrats to those who correctly guessed Matthew Broderick last week. Want to be entered into a drawing to win a gallon of Dutch Boy sage green paint? Simply email me the answer to this week’s “Who Am I?” question. Good luck: “Tomorrow I turn 41. So far I’ve lived a charmed life. Early in my career I starred on Little House on the Prairie, but what put me on the map was a bigger house in one of the most expensive places to live. I’m not the easiest person to work with and eventually got booted from that house (and series) and was replaced by a Saved by the Bell girl that ended up dating David Silvers in real life.”

The HARP program that was designed to help homeowners refinance when their homes have lost most or all of their equity is a real big mess. Some of the big banks (Wells Fargo, for example) had announced that they would join this program on March 15th. The day before, they pulled out. Now it looks like the new date is April 23rd. So…I know a lot of you are anxious to refinance, and my advice would be to hang in there and keep checking in. My guess is we’ll be able to help you in April, May…

Interest Rate Update: Look what happens when I go on a Florida spring break – rates jumped up to their highest levels in 18 months and I returned with one of the worst tans ever. The 30-yr fixed went up to almost 4.375% but has since come down. Rates today are at 4% (give or take) for a 30-yr fixed, and ARM rates are about a point lower. Do you know any friends, family, coworkers, or pets that are looking to buy or refinance a home? Let them know that for any loan over $240k I will waive all lender fees – a $995 savings.

Hugging Quote of the Day 2: “If my father had hugged me even once, I’d be an accountant right now.” – Ray Romano

Timeout for Trivia: Congrats to those of you who guessed Billy Crystal as the March 14 answer. Want to be entered into a drawing to win vacuum cleaner bags? Simply email me the answer to this week’s “Who Am I?” question. Good luck: “I turned 50 last month, so I think that makes me eligible to take the day off if I want. Yeah, maybe I’ll sleep in and then go to Burger King for lunch and order a Whopper. (That’s a burger, not a giant self-aware computer capable of starting a war). Then I’ll come home to my wife, who I thankfully never lost in a Las Vegas card game.”

I’m proud to announce that my loans are now 100% gluten-free.

Wuss’Up This Week: Two biggies are released towards the end of the week that can send rates shooting in either direction. Tomorrow we have the PPI (producer price index), which is a measure of prices at the producer level, and really the first real report about inflation for the month. On Friday we have the CPI (consumer price index), which measures inflation at the consumer level. If rates go up it is because inflation was shown as rising in both the PPI and CPI which will result in a CSI, DUI, DWI, and possibly – but not limited to – a DOA.

Interest Rate Update: Rates are still beautiful, Mortgage Fans. A 30-year fixed remains in the high 3s with ARM rates about a point lower. As usual, for any loan over $240k I will waive all lender fees – a $1,200 savings! Be sure to let your friends, family, coworkers, and co-slackers know this great deal.

Having trouble refinancing because you’ve lost equity in your home? A solution is very, very near. Stay tuned…

Makeup Quote of the Day 2: “Girls: just remember each morning when you put on makeup, somewhere in the world a clown is starting his day doing exactly the same thing.” – (@designersays)

Timeout for Trivia: Congrats to those who guessed John Candy as last week’s answer. Want to be entered into a drawing to win a bottle of Mr. Bubble? Simply email me the answer to this week’s “Who Am I?” question. Good luck: “I turn 64 today. In my horseback riding movie I wear a Mets cap but in real life I am a die-hard Yankees fan. What could you learn from my movies? I am not a monster (2001); it’s impossible to just be friends with Goose’s wife (1989), and if someone is mostly dead I can bring them back to life (1987).”

Barry’s Blog is taking next week off. Aw, what’s that? Are you crying? Please don’t cry. Here…to help ease your pain check out these 50 very special sitcom episodes that might have brought a tear to your eyes too.

According to the FDIC there were no new banks created in the U.S. in 2011, making it the first year since 1984 that the country has gone without the establishment of a single start-up lender. What else do FDIC and 1984 have in common? ’84 was the year I graduated high school, and my second semester report card read F,D,I (incomplete), C and I’m pretty sure the C was in gym).

Wuss’Up This Week: I anticipate rates to stay relatively quiet until Friday’s Employment numbers for February are released. Unemployment is expected to drop to 8.2% and it’s predicted that 190k new jobs were created. Anything short of these numbers will bring lower rates, but anything higher…

Interest Rate Update: A 30-year fixed remains in the high 3s/low 4s with ARM rates about a point lower. As usual please let your friends, family, coworkers, Cubs fans, (and yes – even Sox fans) know that for any loan over $240k I will waive all lender fees – a $1,200 savings!

Bird Quote of the Day 2: “If you have a parrot and you don’t teach it to say, “Help, they’ve turned me into a parrot,” you are wasting everybody’s time.” – Julia Segal (@juliasegal)

Timeout for Trivia: Congrats to those of you who guessed Ron Howard as last week’s answer. Want to be entered into a drawing to win a Play-Doh barber shop set? Simply email me the correct answer to this week’s “Who Am I?” question. Good luck: “I died on this date in March of 1994. I ate plenty of my last name, which probably helped lead to my death. In 1980, I starred in a movie with a guy from Joliet who also died fat and young; but he died from drugs. In 1984 I played Tom Hanks’ brother in a movie about a girl you would only take out for sushi if she were a cannibal.”

Personal shout out to my friends and family: I realize my addiction to Cinnamon Toast Crunch is getting out of control and would welcome an intervention.

Wuss’Up This Week: This is a big week for economic news that can sway rates in either direction. Today we have the Fed’s Beige Book report (details of current economic conditions across the US; signs of weakness will lead to lower rates) and the Fed’s FOLLY report (Fed’s Ongoing Love of Leap Year). Tomorrow we have the Weekly Jobless Claims report and the Personal Income and Outlays report (which is a measure of consumers’ ability to spend). Any weakness in either of these will help bring rates down. And yes, I did make up the FOLLY report, but really, what’s not to love about February showing the other months who’s boss?

Interest Rate Update: Rates remain flat with 30-year fixed in the high 3s/low 4s, and ARM rates about a point lower. Please remind your family, friends, coworkers, and pets that for any loan over $240k I will waive all lender fees (a $1,200 savings!). This can be for purchases or refinances.

Girlfriend Quote of the Day 2: “I don’t have a girlfriend. But I do know a woman who’d be mad at me for saying that.” – Mitch Hedberg

Timeout for Trivia: Congrats to those who guessed Drew Barrymore last week. Want to be entered into a drawing to win a stapler (still in the box! I stole it from the file cabinet in our office). Simply email me the answer to this week’s “Who Am I?” question. Good luck: “Tomorrow I turn 58. My last name can also be a first name. I once starred in a sitcom with a guy who only answered to an abbreviated version of his last name (it sounded better than “Arthur”). I hit it big as a director with my 1984 movie starring a girl with a guy’s name for her first name and a girl’s first name for her last name. Confused? You can probably figure out who I am if you link me to my space movie where one of the actors’ last names would taste good with eggs.”

Has it really been 20 years since this movie was snubbed from winning Best Picture?